Do you ever get that weird feeling? Like you've got this awesome idea, so good it's almost burning a hole in the back of your head, but you just can't seem to find the right way to bring it into the world? Me too!
I've always thought of raw creation and play as the tool to try and solve this very problem. Sometimes creating a rough version, or taste of that awesome idea can lead us to amazing places. My life has been full of these moments. Whether the final idea ever materializes, or not, the process almost always leads me on amazing journeys. These journeys ultimately help shape the way I perceive the world around me.
However my journey hasn't always been easy. For a lot of my life I've struggled with conflicted feelings of my own self worth, confidence, depression and the anxiety surrounding my decision making. Because of this, I kept my creative side hidden, choosing to think of it as a distraction hindering my ability to be responsible or to pursue "real" goals. I grew to hate my creativity, rather than to love and embrace this quality about myself. I let fear control my actions. I feared how the world might perceive me.
However my creative side still burned like a raging campfire, growing in warmth and intensity year after year as I gave it more fuel. It escaped through artwork, scattered journals, texts and conversations with friends, doodles and the ideas I would jot down at work or school. This raw creative energy couldn't be contained forever and in 2021 during the Pandemic I decided to begin posting bits and pieces of the art I was doing.
These works grew and grew and I began expanding into different mediums, such as animation, photography, video, digital art, programming, augmented reality, virtual reality, artificial intelligence and others. I began to surrender to my creative spirit and let it, and my curiosity, guide me instead of my fear. Because of this, I've sought to be a sponge for the world. I began to operate under a more simple principle: If it sounds interesting, try it, try it, try it and don't look back. From there find the friends, guides and tools to help you fully express your idea. Sometimes raw creative expression can reveal secrets and understanding about ourselves. These revelations are divinely powerful and have the abilty to overcome our inner-critic (EGO), as well as push past the dogma and static perceptions of how tools, mediums or techniques "should" be applied.
As artists we are trying to scratch an itch that can never truly be scratched. There will always be ideas and there will always be new ways of expressing them. It's up to us to surrender to our own processes to better express our true beauty. And to most of all have fun and share the happiness of that expression with others.
I know how valuable your time is and I appreciate every second you spent learning about my journey. There is so much I have yet to share and look forward to what the future holds. Truly thank you 🙏.
EGO ME ET EGO SUM PULCHER
